On Facebook, Kate Kleinert was accustomed to receiving friend requests from strangers, which she typically declined.
She did, however, accept a friend request and a message one day that permanently altered her life.
“I was not looking for romance by any means,” Kleinert stated. “I answered it, and then he was like, ‘Oh, well, how are you,’ you know, ‘My name is Tony.'”
According to Kleinert, she clicked with the man posing as “Tony” right away. He informed her that he had two children and worked as a surgeon in Iraq.
She thought he was gorgeous and charming. They were conversing often throughout the day before you knew it. She would even communicate with his kids via email. That’s what she believed, anyway.
“I had been widowed for 12 years at that point,” she stated. “It was nice talking to a man again, and every single night he would call me and say, ‘How was your day, honey,’ nobody asked me that anymore.”
Before Kleinert claimed to have ever solicited her for money, the two spoke for months. Then, however, he persisted in his inquiries, typically for urgent reasons.
He needed it for food, for his children, or to call her using a stronger WiFi signal. He asserted that transferring money in Iraq was challenging, if not deadly. However, he consistently pledged to reimburse her.
He eventually needed money to take a plane to Philadelphia to meet her. Kleinert had lost almost $40,000 by that point.
On the day he was scheduled to land at Philadelphia International Airport, “Tony” eventually failed to appear.
“Losing that amount of money was devastating, but losing that relationship broke my heart,” Kleinert stated.
How to avoid falling into romance scams?
Tens of thousands of people are affected, primarily in secret, by the sinister and perilous side of internet romance. Stories like Kleinert’s are not unusual, according to the FBI, which warns of romance scams.
“The numbers seem to increase year after year, after year,” said Joe Wolfley, a special agent in the FBI’s Philadelphia Field Office who specializes in cybercrimes. “Unfortunately, everybody can be the target of this.”
Scammers search social media for information and details to entice their victims, according to Wolfley. “The first step to protecting yourself is being careful about what you share publicly,” he said.
“These scammers are really good,” Wolfley told. “They have scripts. They have all sorts of information they can pull from.”
The FBI advises looking up any images the individual gives to see whether the name, image, or data have been used elsewhere if you think you’re the victim of a fraud. Kleinert is now aware that the images of “Tony” were taken from a real South American surgeon’s Instagram account.
The Federal Trade Commission reports that in 2023, the most recent year for which data is available, consumers lost $1.14 billion to romance scams.
According to a recent poll conducted by cybersecurity company Malwarebytes, 10% of participants stated they had lost at least $10,000, while over 65% of respondents said they had been the target of a romance scam.
The fact that victims are not only left penniless but also devastated and frequently ashamed to confess it is what makes this crime so crafty. In Kleinert’s instance, she had kept her struggles to herself, even from her own relatives.
A few months later, Kleinert handed her con artist so much money that she was unable to pay for the repair of her damaged air conditioner. In the meanwhile, she used an outdated portable unit to cool her living room, but one night it caught fire. Six of her foster dogs perished, and she lost her entire house.
“I was really stripped down to nothing,” she stated.
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In retrospect, Kleinert acknowledges that she had doubts about herself and her actions on multiple occasions, but she disregarded her intuition.
She remarked, “I was so stubborn,” “I was, I think, ignoring the red flags because I wanted it so badly.”
After the swindle, Kleinert had to start over. Since then, she has discovered a new calling in helping others by connecting with scam survivors and sharing her experience.
Kleinert is an advocate for the Fraud Watch Network of the AARP. Even the White House has heard her speak.
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She advises individuals to discuss these scams with their loved ones, but above all, she wants those who have fallen victim to know they are not alone.
Kleinert declared, “I’m not going to hide,” “It’s a tough story to tell, but if it stops somebody else from falling for this, then it’s worth doing.”
Through the FBI’s Internet Crime Complaint Center (ic3.gov), you can report romance scams if you believe you have been a victim.
Additionally, anyone can get free emotional support from AARP’s fraud helpline by calling 877-908-3360 or by visiting their website.
